library guides by lou blake

library

short guides that I've created from 10y of experience approaching

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cold approach for introverts

A lot of introverted people think approaching others is something reserved for naturally social personalities, and I used to believe that too, because talking to strangers never felt natural to me, but...

build a habit of approaching people

Most people wait until they feel confident before approaching others, but confidence usually comes after repetition, not before, and what worked for me was building a simple system that made approaching automatic...

getting to the location is the hardest part

For many people the hardest part of approaching others is not the conversation, it is simply getting to the location and spending time there, because once you arrive you start feeling doubt,...

rejection mindset

One of the biggest shifts when approaching people is how you start seeing rejection, because in the beginning it feels personal and uncomfortable, but over time it becomes something neutral, almost like...

lowering the bar when approaching people

Many people struggle with approaching others because their expectations are too high, they think they need to be interesting, confident, or socially smooth, and that pressure creates hesitation before anything even starts....

approach uniform and reducing friction

One simple thing that helped me stay consistent was removing small decisions before going out, because hesitation often comes from overthinking simple details like what to wear or where to go, and...

environment design and planning ahead

Your environment shapes your behavior more than motivation does, and I noticed that when I prepared the situation ahead of time, approaching people became easier without needing to force confidence, because the...

consistency and putting yourself in lucky positions

A lot of results from approaching people come from simply being present in the right place at the right time, and that only happens when you show up consistently over long periods,...

approach anxiety and how it fades

Approach anxiety feels like a heavy wall at first, and people think it means they are not cut out for approaching, but most of the time it is just the brain reacting...

staying chill during sessions

A lot of people sabotage their sessions by rushing, the moment they get to the location they start scanning fast, speed walking, judging themselves for missed chances, and that anxiety builds until...

a simple 30 day plan

If you want a simple plan, keep it boring, most people overcomplicate it, they search for perfect lines, perfect strategies, perfect timing, and then they do nothing, a better plan is just...

do not rely on friends to start

A common trap is thinking you need a friend with you to approach, it feels safer, it feels more normal, and it can reduce the awkwardness at first, but the problem is...

accountability bets and sticking to the plan

Sometimes you do everything right and still feel stuck, you go out, you circle, you hesitate, you leave early, and you repeat the same pattern, and at that point you need something...

comparison and internet advice

One thing that messes people up is comparison, you watch someone online talk about big results, smooth interactions, perfect confidence, and then you look at your own messy sessions and feel like...

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free pdf guide:

approach habit building + choosing locations

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